


Even so, I'll be watching you.

by driftingdownwards



Category: OMORI (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bittersweet, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Post-good ending, i just want things to be happy-ish, not beta'd im too scared to ask for help, usage of harsh language like d(a)mn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:48:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29352975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/driftingdownwards/pseuds/driftingdownwards
Summary: Sometimes, the truth is hard to come to terms with. It's even harder when you've lived a lie for the past four years. But maybe, just maybe, things can go back to the way they were again.A story about a conversation at a lake.
Relationships: Hero/Mari (OMORI)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 65





	Even so, I'll be watching you.

When Sunny walked into Basil’s hospital room, it was a bombshell. But when he opened his mouth, it felt like they were forever trapped in the fallout, perpetually in the blast radius.

The three of them stood there, agape as their friend Sunny, started to recount the truth of his sister’s death. The words rushed out of Sunny’s mouth, his breathing growing more and more hoarse as he went on. Towards the end, he knelt to the ground, his weeping cutting into his voice.

When all was said and done, Aubrey, Kel and Hero were speechless. Sunny continued to cry on the cold linoleum. His quiet sobs and the sterile noises of medical equipment were the only things piercing through the deafening silence of the room.

Hero’s eyes darted around. He tried to come up with a measured statement, something that would be able to placate everyone there. Perhaps an “it’s okay”; “we’re here for you”; maybe even a “we’ll always be behind you!”, but his wits failed him at every turn. One part of his mind tried to hold back its other sections: the sections threatening to burst at the seams, ready to drown him and everyone else in his grief and anger made manifest.

He tried to keep his footing firm on the ground, but he started to ebb and flow. A vein began popping out near his temple. His chest felt tight. He balled his hands into fists, if only to hide the way his hands started to tremble.

Hero tried to speak, but only air left his mouth. Without realising it, his legs brought him through the door and down the hall. Kel shouted, trying to go after him, to no avail.

Hero needed distance.

He slammed on the elevator button and dove in. From a distance, he could make out the bright yellow of Kel’s jersey and Aubrey’s pink hair. Hero leaned against the back of the elevator as he waited for the whirring to stop and the doors to open again.

He didn’t feel ready to talk. Not to Kel, not to Aubrey, sure as _hell_ not to Sunny or Basil. He needed time to prepare, or at least to create some kind of buffer between his emotions and his actions before moving further.

* * *

The doors of the elevator opened to the main lobby. Hero rushed out. The mid-day sun had risen above the town, its beaming heat scorching the ground below, forming a haze emanating from the asphalt.

Hero dove to the side of the hospital. Stopping, he took his breath and sat on a white wooden bench. The veins at his temple throbbed incessantly: he felt as if his head was about to explode. Even as he reclined against the back of the bench, he felt the world spin around him.

He tried to quell his runaway mind, but peace had left him long before he sat down. Sorting through everything in his mind was impossible: a jigsaw with every piece filed off, no longer clicking into place or making any coherent sense.

Hero was in the middle of filtering through his disparate thoughts, trying to make sense of the words and experiences he had felt over the week when Kel appeared.

“Hero, are you okay?” Kel’s voice quivered as he tried to catch his breath. His face was marked with concern.

“Kel, I’m sorry, but I think I need to be on my own right now.” Hero stood up, ready to move away from the hospital side to somewhere quieter. He didn’t want to upset his brother, but he couldn’t handle any further stress on himself.

Kel widened his stance, trying to block his brother from walking past him. A pang of panic and desperation struck across his face. He went wide-eyed.

“Wait, Hero, you have to help me!” Kel pled to Hero. “Please, I don’t know what to do, Aubrey’s sobbing and shouting, Sunny’s still on the flo-“

“Kel, take care of your own goddamn problems for once!” Hero pushed his brother away and walked forward. Kel yelped from the sudden push. Hero turned to look at his brother. He could see the fear and hurt in his brother’s eyes. The pit in his stomach grew heavier, a fresh round of grief watering the seeds.

“I just need some time, Kel. I’m sorry.” Before Hero could register any reaction from his brother, his body turned him around and his legs began to run.

Hero didn’t care. His body focused on putting one foot in front of the other. His pace quickened, his body trying to outpace his conscious mind. After the words he said, he needed distance more than ever. He needed to be somewhere alone, somewhere hidden. He didn’t want to; he _couldn’t_ hurt another person from his current state. And so, eyes pointed to the ground, his mind kept his feet moving, running through the streets of Faraway until the pavement gave way to grass and clay. It was only when he stopped that he realised where he was.

* * *

The waters of the lake laid placid in the evening sun. Dragonflies buzzed and flitted against lilies, rippling the surface. The gazebo on the lake’s central islet stood slightly crooked, its planks sagging under the summer humidity.

When Hero’s conscious mind caught up with his body, he sighed. No matter wherever he went in Faraway, it would never be far enough to fully pull away from any semblance of his memories.

He walked across the pier to its edge, the rickety wooden planks ebbing slightly beneath his footsteps. Taking his shoes off, he let his feet dip into the cold water of the lake. The ache in his heels began hitting harder. Hero sat there in silence with his thoughts, as he watched the creeping sun advance towards the horizon. He let go of the breath he held in the pit of his stomach since he had left the hospital. His heartbeat started to cool down as he moved back into a clearer state of mind. He set his eyes towards the skyline from the clearing.

In the distance, he could make out the spire of the hospital. For a moment, Hero seized up. He thought about Kel, probably concerned and reeling from the shouting earlier. He thought about Aubrey, struggling to put together everything that had happened over the last three days that shattered her last four years. He thought about Basil and Sunny, how much he _wanted to ki-_

Hero set those words aside.

“What am I thinking?” He put his hands up to his face. Even as he tried to recover his coherent thoughts and feelings, the tremors wouldn’t stop. A trickle became a flood. Everything he had known for the last four years had crumbled before him, had been broken up, had been a lie; what was he supposed to do now?

Mari, the one he loved. Pushed, no, _murdered_ by her own brother, then strung up by him and his best friend to cover it up. All because he couldn’t take a few off notes, because he didn’t practice hard enough for his sister.

And for four years, they let him live that lie. That Mari had killed herself. That she had left this world of her own volition.

That there was something going on, something he could have done to stop it.

Only for the truth to come out. The morning after two of his closest friends tried to kill each other. After he saw a blood-soaked Basil desperately trying to push his garden shears through Sunny’s right eye. After hearing Aubrey scream at the sight of the profuse blood gushing out of their wounds. After he felt his hands grow numb from trying to stem the bleeding from their injuries. After the sirens wavered in and out of existence. After hours waiting in the emergency room, hoping for the best and preparing for the worst. After having to remain strong for Kel and his parents and Aubrey and for Sunny and for Polly and as much as it pained him to admit it, for Mari.

_What now?_ He thought to himself. His life had been uprooted in the span of a day. He didn’t feel ready to come face to face with any of them yet. He could’ve gone home, but the thought of facing his parents without Kel, the writhing mass of questions it would bring up, the mere silence he could muster in reply, pained him more than the idea of returning to the hospital. And so, Hero sat there, letting the tadpoles in the water flit around his ankles as he tried to recuperate and form some semblance of a plan. The sun had just dipped below the horizon, coating the world in a deep indigo.

“Hey Hero, how are you feeling?”

He heard that voice call from behind him. _That voice_. It had been years since he had last heard that voice.

Hero didn’t dare to turn around. Not yet. What if it was some kind of cruel prank one of the kids were up to? What if it was some trick of the mind? His logical side slowly built explanations in his mind. Yet, a part of him still wanted to believe that it _really was her_.

“Is that you? Is that really you?” The words ended up sounding shakier than he had intended. His voice broke as he tried his best to put on a strong front.

“Who do you think it is, good-looking?”

Hero turned around, scared. He braced himself for the worst that his mind could conjure up.

There she stood, beaming at him with a simple smile.

Hero rushed over to her. He grabbed her by the shoulders. To his surprise, his fingers didn’t slip through. Mari didn’t collapse in his hands.

_She’s real. Oh my God, she’s real!_

Hero wrapped his arms around Mari. He couldn’t hold back the flood within him any longer. Tears started flowing freely, seeping into Mari’s sweater. Mari patted his back as she tried to comfort him.

“There there, Hero. I’m here. For now, at least.”

Hero twitched out of recognition of the words. He didn’t know what she meant by them, but he could feel the pain of potential loss all the same. For now, he remained, sobbing in Mari’s arms, clinging to her both out of longing and of comfort.

Soon enough, Hero regained his composure. His breathing slowed down and his eyes began to dry up. He raised his head from Mari’s chest and turned upwards toward her.

“Mari, I can’t believe you’re here.”

“I saw you running here, Hero. I was wondering what happened.”

“I…” Hero didn’t know how to continue that sentence. How could he even come to sum up the sheer chaos of the last four years? How could he come close to talk about the emotions of the last week?

How could he describe how her loss had left him, spending endless nights having nightmares of trying but failing to save her? How could he verbalise the abyssal pit in his stomach when he felt Sunny’s body weaken in his arms last night? How could he reckon with everything that Sunny said when he stumbled into Basil’s room the next morning?

“Is it true, Mari? What happened on that day?”

Mari turned away from Hero and looked out into the distance towards the hospital. The boards of the pier creaked as she turned. In the twilight, the distant streetlights reflected off of Mari’s eyes.

“Yes.”

Hero’s mouth stammered out, incredulous. So many questions plagued his mind and they threatened to rush out all at once.

“But Hero, you have to understand. Let me try to explain. Settle down, okay?”

Mari placed her hand on Hero’s shoulder to try to calm him down. Her touch at the very least was able to make him silent and recollect his thoughts. Hero’s racing heart began to slow once again.

“What happened, Mari?” Hero looked expectantly at Mari, hoping for any words or clarification.

“Hero, sit down and I’ll try to tell you what happened.”

They both sat down at the side of the pier, an arm’s length apart. The moss dampened the wood slightly, but it could still hold their weight fine. After a brief moment of silence, Mari proceeded.

“When I think about it, I feel bad. I could have seen something happening but I never expected this.” Mari twiddled her fingers in her hands as she spoke. “I… pushed Sunny too far, I think.”

Hero opened his mouth but no words came out. Mari began to frown slightly as she continued.

“He put enough pressure on himself because he wanted to do us all good. For the violin.”

“Maybe, I shouldn’t have tried to pile on top of that.”

Mari fell silent, letting that last sentence hang in the air.

Hero mustered the strength to move closer to Mari. They were now sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, gazing out towards the city lights. He didn’t want to fill the air with anything, couldn’t find the words for them if he could have tried. The silence spoke more of the lack of information he had than any human speech.

“I was stretched thin with everything going on. The prep classes, the normal classes, and then the recital. I didn’t want to bring down anyone else with me so I tried to keep it to myself.” Mari trailed off.

Hero winced. Hadn’t he noticed Mari’s weariness? At the time, he chalked it up to general fatigue. He always felt she had been hard on herself but he didn’t expect it to be severe.

“I didn’t realise it then, but I ended up putting out a lot of it on Sunny.” Mari let out a nervous giggle, punctuating the statement. Her expression grew regretful, her smile no longer one of reconciliation but one of sadness.

“Sunny used to practice so hard, but every mistake he made affected something inside me. I couldn’t handle it or just let it slide.”

Mari looked down at her hands. Hero could make out the calluses, still pale. Mari was a perfectionist, that much he knew, but the extent of her methods or what she expected of others was utterly foreign to him. Whenever they hung out, she seemed to take it easy, but after all he had heard thus far, he didn’t know what to think.

“It started with firm words.” Mari sighed. “As the recital got closer and closer, it got worse. I became harsher. Louder. Sometimes, we didn’t talk after practice. We couldn’t.”

Hero turned to Mari as the words left her mouth. Mari’s eyes glistened, a single tear threatening to form in their corners. He put his arm around Mari. He felt like he needed to comfort her through this. Mari took a few deep breaths before continuing.

“It all came to a head, that day. It was the afternoon before the recital. Sunny made a few more sharp notes than usual. I didn’t even realise I had said something about it at first. Then, I heard a loud thud.”

“He threw his violin to the ground.”

“Yeah. I got into a huge fight with him about it. I just got so worked up, you know? It was the day of the recital and I felt like everyone was hoping for us, then Sunny just… threw it all away.”

Mari grew quieter, more hushed. Hero held her tighter. He didn’t know if he was doing it to comfort him or to brace himself for what was going to come next. The sun had fully set by this point, the sky a deep indigo canopy above them.

“I didn’t even think of what I said. I became so mad at Sunny, at everything. I just couldn’t stop worrying about what everyone would think, what could have happened if we postponed, what the violin meant to all of us, what everything led up to.” Mari started to choke up, running out of breath on the last sentence.

“I could see his face starting to cry. He wanted to run away. He didn’t like seeing me like this, but I was carried away. Too worried. Too angry.”

“Then I tried to stop him.” Mari’s voice grew shaky, hoarse, at the thought of that day.

Hero gave Mari a reassuring, concerned smile. Hero didn’t know if he wanted to hear what came next, but he felt that if Mari wanted to talk about it, then she should. Mari smiled feebly in kind and continued.

“I was knocked out of my body the moment I hit the bottom of the stairs.” Mari whispered the words, barely audible above the night wind.

“I couldn’t believe it at first. I saw myself lying there, Sunny running over to my body. He couldn’t believe I was gone. He thought I was sleeping at first, so he put me to bed.”

Mari took a deep breath. Even through the course of trying to steady herself, her whole body shook, juddering like an engine starved of fuel.

“I’d never seen anyone cry like that before, Hero. His weeping, his grief... He knew I was gone and that it was his fault.”

She tried to inhale but she broke down. Now, it was Hero’s turn to comfort her. He pulled Mari in close to him, wrapping his arms around her. Gently, he stroked her back, trying to reassure her that _everything was going to be okay_.

“Shh, there there, Mari, I’m here.”

She slowly started to calm down. Bile rose in Hero’s throat as he realised what would have had happened next. He saw Mari’s crying face before him; one full of pain and anguish. The emotions from earlier swelled through him once again, a turbulent cycle of anger, sadness, disbelief and horror. After the impact of all the words flung at him, he decided to speak.

“But that doesn’t exonerate Basil and Sunny for what they did! They strung you up and lied to us all these years!” Hero spat out the words, finally releasing what was stored inside him since the morning. “How could they… do that to you?” The hurt made itself apparent in his voice, rendering the words jittery and broken.

Mari took a deep breath. “Hero, there was nothing they could do to save me. I was dead when I hit the floor. Even if they knew first aid, it wouldn’t have helped.” She put her hand on Hero’s as she spoke, trying to calm him down.

Hero bolted up, setting her hand aside. The boards bent with the sudden shifting weight. He turned away from Mari, took a few paces and stood at the end of the pier. From behind, Mari could see his frame shake slightly.

“Even then, it doesn’t explain what Basil did. I can’t believe he even thought of doing that. How?” His hands were shaking, twisting and fidgeting at the hem of his sweater.

“Hero, what did you expect them to do? Call for help? If they found me like that, what do you think anyone would have thought? What would _you_ have thought?”

“Well, they should have done something, Mari!” Hero only caught the volume of his words after they had left his mouth and echoed through the trees. He turned around to face Mari. Her face betrayed her disappointment and shock at Hero’s outburst. Hero immediately regretted his words and ran over to Mari to apologise.

Mari raised a flat palm against him as he approached. Hero halted.

“Hero, they were kids. They were scared out of their minds! They didn’t know what to do!”

Mari’s sudden outburst brought Hero to his senses. He could feel the uncertainty and regret blossom in his stomach like a poisoned lily. The words he planned to speak went out the window. He shut his mouth, leaving but a sorrowful frown on his face as Mari continued.

Mari set her hand down and proceeded in a calmer tone. “Hero, do you even know what they both went through in those four years? Basil couldn’t even go a day without feeling like the guilt was consuming him whole. Sunny went through hell and back in his room, _alone,_ for four years.”

The colour drained from Hero’s face. Sunny’s silence. Basil’s aversion to seeing the four of them. Sunny and Basil’s fight. The puzzle pieces of the last three days clicked together. _Oh god,_ he thought. 

“It took everything in Sunny to accept that he wasn’t a bad person. That it was _an accident_.” Mari sighed. She took a few steps forward. Even with the four years between the last time she and Hero had been together, their difference in height had remained constant. She placed her hand on Hero’s shoulder, caressing it gently as she looked into his eyes.

“You have to move on. The accident was four years ago. It wasn’t their fault, Hero.” Mari said, concerned. “I know you care about me, but what happened was just a string of bad things that led to a sad accident. It wasn’t anyone’s fault.”

Hero averted his eyes. He shuffled his feet. He needed time, but with everything happening, it felt wrong not to give an answer. The load he had been carrying for the last four years confronted him; an omen he tried to kick down the road until the day came that life kicked it back to him.

“I’m not asking you to forgive them. Well… maybe I am, but you don’t have to take it all at once. Take your time to come to terms with things. If anything, everyone needs you now. Please, Hero.”

He tried to weigh everything before him, but its pulsating, bundled mass threatened to overwhelm him at any moment. Mari’s hand on his shoulder kept him grounded from his inner thoughts. He looked to Mari’s eyes. He couldn’t find any malice or compromise: only concern and hope. The same hope and joy he used to see in everyone from the better days. Hero sighed, exhausted. He made up his mind.

“I’ll try, Mari. For you. And everyone else.” Hero uttered softly. His weariness caught up with him.

Mari pulled him into an embrace. Hero hesitated at first. Her warmth was something he hadn’t felt for so long. It was so long, and it felt so heartfelt. He wrapped his arms around her.

“Thank you, Hero.”

They let go of each other. Hero felt a ball in his throat. Both of them cried on each other. They looked up at the night sky above them. Wispy purple clouds floated high above, the moon slicing through it like a pool.

“Hey, Hero?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you remember when we first came here?”

Hero jogged his memory. “Kel found it. We all came to scout this place out, then it ended up becoming our hideout.”

“That day was the best. The weather was perfect. The clouds were so high.” Mari paused. Hero felt comfortable letting her mull over her thoughts. The crickets filled in the temporary lull in conversation.

They gazed at the clouds up above. The clouds cast wide, rough purple brushstrokes across the night sky. They were so high above, wafting leisurely, released of any bearings or anchors.

Mari turned to Hero. “You don’t have to worry about me, Hero. I’m free now. I’ll always be with you guys, in one way or another.” She smiled. “It might be hard, moving on like this, but that’s why you guys need each other. Sunny and Basil definitely need your support. Aubrey would probably like to have you around too. You guys really need to make up.”

Hero smiled at this. It was bittersweet: how would he have gone on without? But in his mind, he knew it was inevitable. That no matter what, they had to try their best to stay together so that no one would get hurt or feel alone again.

“Anyways, that’s probably enough heavy stuff for tonight. Come with me!” Mari took Hero by the hand, tugging him along. He didn’t know where she was leading her, but he was ever willing to follow along. They ended up at a picnic spread, laid out off the centre of the clearing. The red plaid cloth brought back so many memories to Hero. _It’s how it used to be,_ he thought to himself. A wind of nostalgia went through his heart.

Mari dug through the picnic basket and took out some sandwiches and a thermos. She set two cups out and poured hot chocolate for them both.

She gestured for Hero to sit down next to her. Hero took his shoes off and obliged. At first, he picked up the sandwich and looked at it with suspicion.

“Come on, Hero! My cooking isn’t that bad, is it?” Mari said, her mouth half-full with sandwich. She nudged Hero.

“Heh, it’s been a while, what can I say?” Hero dug in after that. The sandwich was how he remembered it to be; the fresh lettuce playing off the citrusy vinaigrette and juicy chicken. He hadn’t realised how hungry he was until he started eating. After finishing their sandwiches, they washed it down with the hot chocolate and settled down. The stars came out, twinkling softly above them. After gazing at the stars for a moment, Mari turned to Hero.

“So, why don’t you catch me up on how you’ve been?” Hero didn’t quite catch what Mari had said, his inner thoughts suddenly broken by Mari’s interjection. He threw her a surprised look.

“Hmm, I mean if you prefer…” A smug smile began to creep across Mari’s face. The dawning realisation of what Mari was about to say gradually sobered Hero.

“No, don’t you dar-“

“What’s cookin’, good lookin’?”

A split second of childhood-inspired wincing shot across Hero’s face before they both broke out laughing. Somehow, even the littlest things felt more comfortable once again.

Hero and Mari chatted the night away. Making up for the four years of loss wasn’t easy, but they filled it up as naturally and as candidly as they could.

The night ended with Hero lying on Mari’s lap. Even as his mind and body tired from the sheer force of the last four days, he kept talking. He let himself be free to speak with Mari for this one moment. Hero had spent the last four years trying to be strong, but in Mari’s lap, he felt relieved. Unwound. In the long tresses of her hair, he was a babbling brook.

* * *

Hero woke up to birdsong. Sunlight cast itself directly over his face. The first thing he realised was the hard ground beneath his head.

Mari was gone.

He bolted up. He scanned the environment around him. The lake stood placid, dragonflies battering the surface into gentle ripples. The plaid cloth was no longer beneath him, the picnic basket long gone.

Hero walked to the end of the pier. He gazed at the sky's reflection in the water, broken up by the dragonflies. He turned his eyes to the heavens.

From down below, the clouds looked so high. They drifted through the early morning sky like a cascade of light.

When Hero gazed at them, he could almost make out a smile, its curve wide and welcoming in the middle of the iridescent sky. From right above the wispy strands, the sun began its ascent of the horizon.

_The sun still shines bright, even if she’s not here with us._

The feeling in Hero’s gut felt different today. As tinged with sadness as it was, he could feel something inside him smiling once again. He looked out towards the horizon. His eye caught the sun’s reflection against the tall hospital tower.

He thought of Kel, sitting worried for both of his friends and his brother.

He thought of Aubrey, her anger, grief, and confusion forming knots in her insides that she didn’t know how to unravel.

He thought of Sunny and Basil, probably scared and tired for the come what may, whether it be anger from their friends, the pain of the truth or the pain of the night before.

He thought of what Mari had said, what he had promised her.

And so, Hero started walking.

**Author's Note:**

> this fic was kind of inspired by a lot of yorushika's music, so check them out if you like emotional Japanese alt-pop! the title is from their song, "the clouds and the ghost", which talks about a spirit responding to a loved one they have left behind.
> 
> i think this fic is the first fanfic in general i've ever done so thanks for reading! feel free to put your comments, criticisms and/or jokes below!


End file.
